what is beautiful?

14 Jan

I had this whole blog written about my super-stellar weekend.  But the end of the blog got me to thinking, because I wrote about how I felt beautiful today at the end of Fit1.  Not beautiful like I do when I get dolled up, do my hair, make-up, wear nice clothes.  Obviously, working-out-beautiful is a different kind of feeling than all of that.  But it’s almost better–more authentic for sure.  And it made me happy to acknowledge that beauty doesn’t have to mean “dolled up” and that strong is beautiful.

i am in love with this.

Maybe this is why I like working out so much.  Because the feeling at the end of a workout, when you’ve just pushed your body to do something hard, something most people would not even try, because it IS so hard, or when you’ve gone past a previous accomplishment, went further, faster, better…it’s beautiful.  Bettering yourself feels good.  Working hard feels good.  Doing things that other people think you can’t do feels good.  Doing things that YOU think you can’t do feels good.  Telling that voice in my head to shut up…that feels good.  I am tired tonight.  I was up early yesterday to run 11 miles.  I did an hour and 15 minute full-body fit1 workout today.   We finished up, we were under the Ford Street bridge, I was covered in mud, had been laying on God-knows-what (I’m still trying not to think about it), I was sweaty (it was 50 degrees today! woot!).  I should’ve felt disgusting, but then I thought about the running, squats, pull ups, push ups, ab work and other things I’d done.  And I felt great.  Happy, strong, and beautiful.

the crew who worked out at fit1 this morning!

I have had body image issues for a long time.  What woman doesn’t???  There are images everywhere telling us what we should be.  How we should look.  The things we should do to be a better woman.  Working out allows me to let go of those things.  It allows me to stop thinking about what I should do and focus on the moment.  I think I have a healthier body image now than I ever have had in my life.  That doesn’t mean that I still don’t wish for a six pack or smaller thighs or more cut arms.  That doesn’t mean that I will stop working toward those things.  It just means that I am happy with where I am and what my body can do.  I am happy with pushing myself to the next level.  And I am excited to see where this body of mine can take me next.

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